So An Owl Walks Into A Bar. . .

As I was busy making dinner recently, my son sat at the kitchen counter with his laptop surfing the internet for ‘funny videos’ – feats of daring, epic fails, anything to while away the time before dinner was ready. He came across a video with an intriguing headline and read it aloud to me -
 A Popular London Bar Has a New Waitress, and It’s An Owl
Puh-leeeze‘, he sneered sarcastically, “how can an owl be a waitress? What do they do, carry little glasses in their talons?’ At almost 14 he’s developing that snarky cynicism that’s part and parcel of being a teenager. Determined to get to the bottom of this curious claim, he clicked on it and watched the following video:

Just as suspected, the video didn’t feature any owls dive bombing bar patrons with chocolate martinis at some Hitchcockian happy hour.
His disappointment evident, he lamented, “Why is it they always make things seem soooo exciting and then you click on it and it’s not exciting AT ALL?!?!
Upon hearing those words sail out of his mouth, I felt my parenting senses tingling.  As I stopped chopping peppers and turned around to face him, I heard a clarion call to action, an order to march forth into the minefield that is parenting a teenager and heed the following command -
{Insert Teachable Moment Here}
During these precarious teenage years, broaching almost any subject with your teen can be tricky. So in my most casual, non-judgmental, un-preachy, make-him-think-he-thought-of-it-himself mom tone of voice, I said “You know, you bring up a good point. Sometimes things aren’t what they seem.  I hope you can remember that when you’re, like, at a party some night and someone offers you, um, say {here it comes} a beer or a joint. . .” I trailed off, giving him what I hoped was a subtle prompt as I held my breath expectantly.
And with a requisite roll of his beautiful brown eyes, he continued my thought with, “Yeah, I know, it might look like fun but it really isn’t fun. I get it.”
“Okay then”, I breathed, and, with a smile on my face, continued preparing dinner. And made a mental note to send a donation to The National Audubon Society.
For the owls.

 

The National Audobon Society

Barn Owl – The National Audubon Society

 

Check out the more plausible story Owl-themed cocktail bar to open in London  from The Telegraph.

Snacking & Me: Not Perfect Together

snacking

I saw this on Instagram today and it really resonated with me.  After being told by my doctor at my yearly physical that my alarming weight gain was probably not caused by my thyroid or perimenopause but by Entenmann’s, I’ve been forced to reexamine my eating habits.  Or more specifically my snacking habits.  I snack like a ninja on a rescue mission – silently, stealthily and without witnesses. And I’ll admit that this has led to my snacking getting way out of control.  So in answer to that age-old philosophical question, ‘if I open the giant bar of Toblerone hidden in the big stock pot at the back of the cabinet and sneak-eat in the laundry room, does it make me fat?’ – the answer is  yes.
To that end check out  A Parent’s Guide to Snacking on the Sly by blogger Jess Ullrich at The Momma Review and treat it as a cautionary tale.  While the reasons leading to sneaky snacking are totally valid, for the sake of my waistline I’ll be going through my home and purging all my secret stashes.  And fishing the Hershey’s Kisses out of my bra.
Do you snack on the sly?  What are your secret hiding places? Let me know in the comments!

If I Were Attending the Oscars, This is What I’d Wear

black & white ball gown skirt

 

My favorite part of the Oscars (and for a lot of folks if Pinterest is any indication) is watching the celebrities walk the red carpet. Who wore what, how, and why is endlessly fascinating to me, I suppose because I will probably never be in a position to wear anything that fancy-shmancy. The last time I wore anything that might even be considered remotely appropriate on a red carpet was on my wedding day – and we’re talking appropriate for a red carpet in the 1980s. And chances are I probably won’t have the opportunity to wear anything that ritzy again until my son’s wedding, and that’s a loooong way off.

But if I were to end up somehow attending the Oscars I would be a) astounded – how the hell did  that happen?? and b) determined not to end up on some worst dressed list. My watchwords are understated, elegant and classic.

So when I saw this Carolina Herrera ball skirt paired with a simple white shirt, I knew it was made for me.

Understated? Yes.

Elegant? Absolutely.

Classic? You betcha!

Safe and boring? Perhaps, but I prefer to think of it as timeless. And the fun part is I get to snazz it up with accessories!! Red carpet-worthy accessories. . .

I’d add a pop of color with this ruby and diamond necklace from Harry Winston:

harry winston vintage

With such a statement necklace I’d keep the earrings simple, again with Harry Winston:

harry winston micropave earrings

I’ll forgo a bracelet in favor of a ring, like this antique beauty circa 1915 via Sotheby’s:

diamond ring circa 1915

Some Jimmy Choo shoes:

Jimmy Choo Tinga

and a Marchesa clutch; something small because the skirt has pockets!!

marchesa stringray purse

So what do you think about my Oscar wardrobe choices? What would you wear? Let me know in the comments!

RIP Michele Ferrero, Creator of Nutella

Nutella RiP

Michele Ferrero, Italian entrepreneur, chocolate manufacturer and creator of Nutella, the chocolate hazelnut spread beloved the world over, passed away quietly at the age of 89 on Valentine’s Day.  Many a scrumptious recipe has been developed (not to mention a blog post written) and a diet hastily broken by this delightfully sinful concoction.  Some of my favorite ways of indulging in Nutella are spreading it on a rice cake topped with raspberries, or swirling it on pancakes, sliced strawberries or English muffins. Of course, spooning it straight out of the jar works too.  And although I’ve never baked with Nutella, this Nutella Chocolate Chip Cookie recipe from Sally’s Baking Addiction might get me to put down the spoon and get out the baking sheet.
Rest in peace Mr. Ferrero; regardless of how I get my Nutella fix, my spoon salutes you.

 

nutella with raspberries

Looking for more Nutella recipes? Check out Nutella: The 30 Best Recipes. Do you have a favorite recipe involving Nutella? Let me know in the comments!

“Born In The Wild”? My Teen Says No, Thank You!

Have you seen the ads for the new Lifetime reality series “Born in the Wild”? According to their website, in this new series “families take one step beyond homebirth and make the powerful choice to experience childbirth in the great outdoors. No inductions, no epidurals…just expectant mothers facing and giving birth in the arms of Mother Nature. They’ll take on the unique challenges of their natural environment, tackling every obstacle the wilderness can dish out in order to realize their dream of an outdoor birth.”
Okay.
Quite possibly the best birth control video ever, my 14-year-old son thought the commercial was pretty graphic, which depicts a woman laying in “Mother Nature’s arms” (aka the dirt), with the baby literally bursting out of her vajayjay (the action was blurred but it was pretty obvious what was going on). “I can’t unsee that!!” he moaned, covering his eyes with his hands and worrying aloud about the possibility of retinal scarring. Unable to hide my amusement, I quipped, “Hey, what goes in must come out, right?”
Clearly horrified that perhaps I was about to launch into yet another TED talk (Terrifyingly Embarrassing Discussion) about human sexual reproduction (and all its attendant responsibilities and consequences), he tried to deflect by profusely apologizing for any pain and suffering he caused me during his birth. Considering that he was born into the arms of a fully licensed medical professional in a nice clean hospital and with the assistance of an epidural, his apology was accepted. He is however trying to figure out how to block the Lifetime channel from our TV lineup. And taking mercy on the poor guy, I tabled any further discussion on this topic for another day.
The show premieres on Tuesday, March 3rd at 10 pm on Lifetime.  My son won’t be watching. Will you? Let me know in the comments!

My Valentine From Supermodel Cindy Crawford

Cindy Crawford2
On this Valentine’s Day I was so thrilled to receive a Valentine, a love letter if you will, from none other than supermodel Cindy Crawford!
Okay, so maybe she didn’t send a Valentine to me personally, but with her non-retouched photos in the April 2015 issue of Marie Claire magazine I feel she’s sending every 40+ woman a major dose of love.  For every woman who’s tired of looking at all the nipped, tucked, tweaked, airbrushed and photoshopped images in magazines, Cindy’s photos are a revealing reality check. In fact, except for the ads, the issue will feature 100% non-retouched photos – imagine that!
Cindy shows us what being 48 years old with two children really looks like – and it’s beautiful.
Will you be buying the April issue of Marie Claire magazine? Let me know in the comments!

happy-valentines-day-2015-greetings