The Birds, the Bees & Bye Bye Birdie

Last week we went to see the 7th & 8th grade production of Bye Bye Birdie at my son’s middle school.  I am particularly fond of this piece because, back in the day, I was one of the “screaming girls” in my 8th grade’s production of the musical.  I remember how much fun all my friends and I had singing the songs during rehearsals, and how exciting the performances were.  I felt that my son would also enjoy the play because, although it is set in the late 1950s, the themes still ring true today – bewildered parents, their hormone driven teenagers, and the maniacal worship of teen idols (paging Justin Bieber – or is it One Direction now?  Kids!).  My son absolutely roared with laughter at one point when, during a frustrating encounter with his children, the Harry MacAfee character sputters, “I didn’t know what puberty was until I was almost past it!”  I think he found that funny because there’s been so much puberty talk at school lately (it’s one of the units of study this semester) that he couldn’t imagine anyone actually missing it!

As I was helping my son study for a test on that subject one evening, I could tell by my husband’s bemused expression that, like Harry MacAfee, he didn’t quite know what to make of it all.  Certainly our respective parents never quizzed us on the term for “the spurting out of semen from the penis” or the name of “the entire outside genital area of a female”.  In my experience, “the period talk” consisted of receiving an informative book and a box of pads courtesy of Kimberly-Clark, and where babies came from (and how they got there in the first place) was not a topic parents discussed with their children.  But there I sat, discussing testicles, vaginas, and nocturnal emissions with my son as though we were chatting about what he had for lunch in the cafeteria that afternoon, while my husband busied himself in the kitchen so as not to get involved disturb us.  I knew he felt uncomfortable, but he would have to get over that, and fast.

I will say that talking about puberty and the changes that both boys’ and girls’ bodies undergo in such a matter-of-fact way has so normalized this conversation that I feel it has opened the door for a kind of closeness that I’m sure many of us didn’t experience with our folks when we were growing up.  I want my son to know that he can talk to me about this or anything else that comes his way.  I certainly welcome and feel very comfortable with this new chapter in our relationship.  I remember reading about a Details  magazine article where The Avengers  star Chris Evans revealed that his mom was the first person he told when he lost his virginity.  I wonder if I will be privy to that information.  I mean, the kid just gave me a surprisingly accurate explanation of the process of menstruation and he’s figured out why mommy has a “stomachache” every month, so I guess anything is possible.

While I was making breakfast on the morning of the test, my son asked my husband to quiz him on the material one last time.  I held my breath for a second to see if he was going to lob this one over to me or whether he would bite the bullet and jump on the puberty bandwagon.  Without skipping a beat my husband said “Sure” and they sat down together for a final review.  And with that we all entered a brave new world.

Oh, and the test?  My son came home proudly waving it around yesterday.  He got a 95.  🙂

Check out “What’s the Matter with Kids Today” from the 1963 film version of Bye Bye Birdie

Photos courtesy of Wikipedia and Barnes & Noble

And the Beautiful Blogger Award Goes to. . .

Me!  I am certainly enjoying an embarrassment of riches lately!  Just last month I thoroughly enjoyed a game of blog tag initiated by the engaging Kathy Lashley, and now I have been nominated by the lovely What Jane Read Next for the Beautiful Blogger Award!  I picture myself gliding across the stage in an elegant Marchesa gown to accept my award, which is a glittering Swarovski crystal laptop (jeez, this thing is heavy) as the crowd shouts out my name – “Mom? Mom??  MOM!!”  Oh wait, that’s my son. . . well, back to reality!

The rules of this game are simple: share seven things about yourself and then nominate seven other bloggers.

First, I’ll share:

  •  I love action movies – Transformers, Mission Impossible, Die Hard – anything with heroes, villains, explosions, aliens, totally improbable plot lines, etc., and I’m in.
  • My favorite flower is the peony, and they’re in season right now. Their lush blooms and delicate scent are so evocative of spring for me.

  • I don’t like getting manicures; I’d rather do it myself.  But I would get a pedicure every day of the week if I could.  Go figure.
  •  Unlike What Jane Read Next, I love listening to the Gotye song “Somebody That I Used to Know” precisely because it reminds me of somebody that I used to know.
  •  My favorite place to be is the beach, and I would love to have a house by the ocean someday.
  •  Last summer when I went to Rome on vacation, I fell in love with burrata, a delicious cheese that originates from Puglia – delizioso!

  •  It is very unfortunate that I am allergic to both dogs and cats, (I had to take my son to the allergist with me so the doctor could explain it to him because he wouldn’t believe me) so we have fish – sometimes.

 Now, the nominations for the Beautiful Blogger Award go to:

I look forward to learning more about these great bloggers and thanks again to What Jane Read Next for thinking of me!

Photos courtesy of theKitchn.com and Google Images

Fifty Shades of Nutella

I’m standing at the kitchen counter about to start dinner.  I open the cabinet to round up the ingredients for this evening’s meal and I see it, that seemingly innocent white-lidded jar, beckoning my attention.  I look away and continue gathering my supplies, but its call is too great to ignore.  I remove the Nutella  from the cabinet and slowly twist off its lid.  I open the drawer below and grab a spoon.  I put  the jar on the counter and hold it in place with one hand as I dip the spoon into the jar with the other, its contents yielding against the touch of the stainless steel.  I raise the spoon to my lips, closing my eyes and inhaling its familiar, delicate fragrance.  As it finds its way into my mouth, this intoxicating concoction slides off the spoon and onto my tongue, enveloping it like a silky blanket, the hint of hazelnut providing the perfect counterpoint to the smooth, velvety chocolate.  I open my eyes and, staring into the cabinet, inspiration strikes – dare I reach for the peanut butter?  My taste buds shiver at the thought.  No, I decide as my inner goddess pouts, that’s too much for now.  “Perhaps another time”, I can almost hear the peanut butter grinning salaciously.  I plunge the spoon into the jar again and again, greedily devouring the Nutella like a . . .

A small voice shakes me out of my reverie.  “Is dinner almost ready?” my son calls out from the living room.  I look down sheepishly at the jar in my hand and realize I’ve just consumed 600 calories worth of Nutella and we haven’t even had dinner yet.  I put the jar down and knot my fingers on the counter, chastising myself over my loss of control.  As I bite my lower lip, my subconscious smirks at me over her half-moon specs and clucks “A moment on the lips, no matter how sweet, a lifetime on the hips.”

I roll my eyes at her and angrily throw the spoon into the sink.  I shove the jar back in the cabinet, vowing to never lose control like that again (at least until the next time I open the cabinet).  Oh Nutella, you are a cruel master. . .

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Photos courtesy of Google Images and nutellachocolate.com

I Was a Cereal Killer – One Mom’s Cautionary Tale

What have I done?

I know my 11-year-old son is a competent kid.  He likes to help his dad out at the store and recently our neighbors hired him to look after their cats while they are away on vacation.  He does well in school, is a brown belt in karate, loves to play both classical and pop tunes on the piano, puts his dirty clothes in the hamper (mostly), keeps his room fairly neat, is always up and dressed for school on time, is helpful, polite, and is never ever sick at sea.

So I was a little thrown this morning when I found him looking at a YouTube video on how to make a bowl of cereal (I was kind of relieved, there are worse things to look at on YouTube).  But. . . seriously?? He doesn’t know how to fix a bowl of cereal?  How did that happen?  I looked at the computer screen, fairly surprised that there must be other kids in the same situation judging from the variety of  videos available on this subject.

While I admired his initiative to find an answer to his dilemma (there isn’t anything you can’t learn to do via YouTube – scary) I wondered why he just didn’t ask me to pour him a bowl of cereal.  The truth is, whenever he says “I’m hungry”, I jump like some Pavlovian dog, ready to fix him a snack or get him a drink or start dinner a little earlier.  It’s well known that hearing your baby cry during the early weeks of life can cause a mother’s breasts to leak milk – his call for food just speaks to my primal instinct as a mom to make sure my baby is fed.

But the fact is, he’s not a baby anymore.  He knows where the kitchen is, but thanks to me I realized that it’s a bit of a mystery to him how the food magically appears on a plate or in a bowl.  It became obvious why he didn’t ask for my help.  His quest to figure out how to fix his own breakfast is an assertion of his increasing self-reliance.  He’s letting me know that he’s now capable of fixing his own breakfast/snack/whatever.  Maybe next he’ll let me know that he’s capable of doing his own laundry.

I watched him silently as he fixed his own cereal, poured his own juice and sat down at the table to eat breakfast.  It’s a kitchen, I reminded myself, it’s not like he has to go out and forage for nuts and berries.  I smiled, happy and a little sad that my baby son is becoming more self-sufficient by the minute, before my very eyes.

You know, this could be a very good thing.  I wonder if he can learn to whip up breakfast in bed in time for Mother’s Day?  I’m sure there must be a YouTube video for that. . .

Images courtesy of YouTube and Google Images

The “It” Girl

Tag, looks like I’m It!  The other day I was “tagged” by the engaging Kathy Lashley.  Turnabout is fair play and now. . .

TAG, YOU’RE IT!

To play, please follow and post these rules:

  • Answer the question the “tagger” listed for you in their post
  • Create 11 new questions for the people you tag to answer
  • Choose 11 people to tag and link to them in the post
  • Let each blogger know that you have tagged them

Kathy’s question for me was, “How’s those tweezers been treating you lately?”  And the answer is that Tweezy and I are still BFFs.  As I lamented in my post “Oh the Hairs on my Chinny, Chin Chin”, I have reached a point on the midlife merry-go-round where chin hair has become a fact of my grooming life and my tweezers are a vital part of that ritual.  Lately it’s become an all-out turf war, and I’m not giving up without a fight.  I can’t stand to see those delinquent whiskers just hanging out there on my chin like street hoods on the local corner, mocking me, daring me to make the first move.  “Do you feel lucky punks. . . well do you???” my inner Clint Eastwood challenges as I reach for my trusty Tweezerman and in a few swift, expert plucks I pop a cap into those bad boys – well, at least until the next growth cycle, and then the gang sweep starts all over again.  Maybe next time I’ll channel The Terminator.

Let’s play Tag Toss Up.  I’ve asked 11 questions and tagged 11 great bloggers.  They can choose to answer any question they wish; also, anyone else reading this post can answer a question if they are so inclined.  Ready?

Here are the tagged:

  1. iliketheworldfuzzy
  2. Laurie J. Long
  3. The Small Investor
  4. Hike. Blog. Love.
  5. help4yourfamily
  6. When the Kids Go to Bed
  7. CarrieLouWho
  8. Truth and Cake
  9. Diary of a Girl Dad
  10. Grammaniac
  11. DENY Designs

And these are the questions:

  1.  What is your best memory from childhood?
  2. If you could eliminate any household chore, what would it be?
  3. What’s your favorite color and how does it make you feel?
  4. How has your life been different from what you’d imagined when you were a child?
  5. Was there a teacher who had a particularly strong influence in your life?
  6. Where would you like to be in 10 years?
  7. What has been the proudest moment in your life so far?
  8. What are you allergic to?
  9. What is your favorite travel destination?
  10. What is your favorite scent/smell?
  11. If you died tomorrow, what would you regret leaving undone?

I look forward to reading some interesting responses.  Thanks to Kathy for asking me to come out and play!

Photo courtesy of Google Images